mother-entropy:

dinkywinks:

dinkywinks:

i just cant get over the lobster scene. like his friends are actively begging him, do not get into the lobster tank. please eddie. tom hardy you were in mad max fury road dont do this. and tom hardy looks at his friend like “i know i shouldnt do this. i shouldnt be getting into this lobster tank but i’m going to anyway. i’m already mostly inside. cant stop now. i’m sorry i dont want to be doing this either there’s just no other choice for me.” and then he takes a bg bite out of a live lobster that’s still in the shell and everything. 

tom hardy doesn’t actually know he’s being possessed by an alien yet in the story. he’s just resigned himself to whatever fucking meltdown he seems to be having. he doesn’t even seem particularly surprised that things have gone this way for him. like ten minutes later he finds out his heart stopped working and hes just like “you asshole” and he throws his alien parasite against the wall like a water balloon. and then he just leaves and is immediately kidnapped. what a fucking wild ride tom hardy is on. 

tom hardy’s actual superpower is being the exact same level of dysfunctional no matter what is happening in his life. so when everything’s going ok for him he self-destructs spectacularly, but when literally everything that can happen to a human being happens to him, he does, like, unrealistically well. climbing into a lobster tank and eating a live animal with large claws just like… “well, this is what’s happening to me today. i’m so sorry you have to watch this, man. anyway here goes, i’m going to bite into a living creature with my human mouth and then LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS”

this movie’s fucking killing me from the inside.

IT WASNT EVEN IN THE SCRIPT TOM HARDY IS JUST A FUCKING GENUINE MADMAN

THIS SHIT is why finding out he was heavily involved in writing the sequel has made it worth spending “opening night at the theater” money on.

jadeeyes1:

orteil42:

orteil42:

love drinking water while taking a piss every chance i get to remind myself of my status as, ultimately, just a loud little tube with opinions

single btw

Can’t imagine why.

marem0to:

wickedangels:

[I.D: a tweet by weesha @rvndezvous that says,

“"i can fix him” relax bob the builder he got like 10 others girls tryna fix him too y'all look like a construction crew". End I.D]

zombiesbecrazy:

drakefeathers:

drakefeathers:

drakefeathers:

jason coming back to gotham and realizing like… a lot of things are named after him. in his memory. i wonder how that feels. and he’s like ok there’s a library, and a community centre, and a hospital wing, but that has to be it, right? but nope there’s a lot more!! because a lot of gotham got rebuilt after the earthquake with help from wayne enterprises lmao

jason becoming annoyed every time he walks by the park that has a big sign for the jason todd memorial duck pond 😤

#jason buying groceries and getting asked if he’d like to round up to donate to the jason todd memorial childrens fund (@bluebeauregard)

Jason, mumbling to himself as he donates $50: I am the Jason Todd Memorial Children’s Fund.

ingenders:

I’m absolutely losing it

sexhaver:

the difference between sex and gender is that i didn’t have gender with your mom last night. hope this helps

bitchsasuke:

yes i love violence

cielhelm:

the take that “enemies to lovers doesn’t have to involve violence!!!” is so boring. knives to the throat or don’t bother

prguitarman:

firebuug:

serfin-u-s-a:

airsignz:

himborc:

maamlet:

oh youre bi? why dont you “bi” me some time with a distraction while i crack this safe ya fuckin goon

you got it boss (makes out with the bank teller and his wife)

bellafleurs:

truetocaesar:

kraniumet:

meet cute: it’s raining and I see your battered bleeding body lying in the mud and I kick it slightly to see if you’re dead